Achievement.

The alarm went off at 3.25a.m. It was November 7th 2010. It was time. I had had a fitful sleep all night, partly because of my nerves and partly the darned daylight savings time change. Also, iPhone got a bug where it would not update time on its own. Perfect timing! Anyways, I was up on time. I got dressed in many layers, it was going to be a cold day, with a high of 49 and winds at 15 miles/hr. I didn't eat anything. I had not been eating well since Thursday. Anxiety. Amit dropped me in front of New York Public Library and in no time I was headed to Staten Island, to fulfill my dream. Yes, I was about to run the NYC marathon. The race I had been dreaming about for years.

The villages for each corral in Staten island looked no less than Refugee camps. Inside were hundreds and thousands of runners, huddled together, sharing blankets along with race stories. I had some coffee and a bagel and sat in a tent thinking of all the mornings I had been up at the crack of dawn to run. All the hot summer days when I was pounding the asphalt when I should have been sitting indoors with the air on. The cold and snowy winter last year, when I was getting off the couch and on the streets, how I would juggle work, friends, family and train....all for this day. It had been a long and hard journey.

I made some friends in my tent and five hours passed. At 10.10 a.m. my corral started the race. It was quiet on the bridge. I looked at the water and the city skyline and soaked in the sight.

After the long Verrazano-Narrows bridge (2miles) we entered Brooklyn and were greeted by hoards of cheering crowds. There was a reason I loved this city. The first 10 miles were spent giving high fives to the little children in the crowds and just waving in general. I felt on top of the world.

Queens was just the same. There were cheerleaders and rock bands and more people. I was keeping great time. Doing less than a 10 minute mile. I truly felt like a rock star!

As we entered the Bronx, the body was feeling the brunt of all those miles. I had hit my 20 mile mark in 3.35. ( I did 3.53 in training) but now I was slowing down. As if they knew what was on my mind...

As soon as we touched Manhattan, the cheers grew louder... I have never seen so many people with so much positive energy. I was just inching my way forward at mile 23 when I saw Amit. He was trying to click my picture and I seriously could not muster a smile, but I was happy. I was so happy. Every part of my body hurt, but I was still going on, I was not going to stop. The memory of those last three miles in Central Park will be etched in my mind forever. The pavement, the fall leaves and the cheers in the background!

I sped up the last one mile for no other reason but to end the pain sooner. Then came mile marker 26...400 yards..300 yards...all the hard work that led me up to this point flashed across my mind. 200 yards....I was going to do this....100 yards...I did it.

My official time was 4.53:26.

The next few moments are a blur. The mind was numb with joy, the body with pain. But nothing mattered anymore. Nothing. I knew it right then.

I wanted to experience this feeling again.

On being an adult

Back when I was in grad school and working full time, life was not easy. It was just one disaster after another. After one such incident, I was very upset, must be my all time low. Then one of my dear patients told me.." Hon, if money can fix it, it is not a problem". Then she told me how her financial problems seemed like nothing when she was holding her bleeding daughter in the hospital. I don't think she realized, but she taught me a great lesson.

Now again 5 years later, I find myself thinking of that day. Experience is the best teacher they say, how true that is. When I was a kid, I always wanted to grow up because, grown ups seemed to have no problems. They were so calm and in control. They never cried or whined for things. They always had everything. Funny how a child's mind works. Now that I am a grown up I would love to be a child again, for the very same reason, that kids don't need much! Guess it is all a part of growing up.

(When I read this entry few years from now, I will probably smile and wonder what I was thinking of).

Blizzard of 2010

Yes, it is all over the news. Every news channel. The nation's capital is buried in snow. Can't believe we moved from Michigan to catch a break from the snow. This is the second blizzard of this winter and it is only early February. We have gotten about 18 inches so far and might get up to 24 or more. I guess, it doesn't make much difference after 12.

I have already read one book, watched three movies, had three cups of hot beverage and still have a day and half to go.

But despite all the mayhem outdoors, I am thankful. I know, sounds lame, but I am. Thankful for this home, warm feet and food in my belly. Life's simple pleasures.